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Take a former student of mine, Naoko, who worked as a programmer. “I just wore the same clothes, but on Sunday I’d go home for half a day, to shower. Sometimes I’ll ask my adult students how often they see their spouses, or ask the kids when they see their fathers.
She worked—wrap your head around this—twenty hours a day. The answer is roughly on par with how often I’ve seen the Easter Bunny.
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On the other hand, if you post: Japan sucks and I’m not having any sex. This rather banal discussion recently took a turn for the interesting, however, after the Japan Family Planning Association reported that 45% of young Japanese women, and over 25% of men, “were not interested in or despised sexual contact.” followed this with a piece entitled Why have young people in Japan stopped having sex? After living in Japan for a few years, this actually makes sense to me. I’m just some dude in Japan who tries to find a clean pair of socks so he can put one on and run to the station to cram onto the train with ten thousand of the unhappiest Japanese people you’ve ever seen. He has Sunday off, which is when he studies English.Why is it I never see anyone on a balcony or in a window? Then I opened the door and found my apartment just as I left it, full of dirty laundry and Cup Noodle containers.And suddenly that seemed kind of strange, but then the feeling passed. Nah, Japan’s still wonderful, I thought as I took a can of malt liquor from the fridge. Someone to clean this place up, cook me some hot meals, and love, eventually.Now don’t get me wrong—again, I don’t mean to imply that there are a lot of men going to these places, or a lot of women working there. What I mean to say is that the fact that it exists changes the way people view relationships. When it came, it was packed as always, so we put on our faces of resignation and forced ourselves on since we had to, then rode without a word.As in, I once dated a girl who told me, “You know, a lot of men would pay good money to be dating me like you are.” Which I really couldn’t argue with because, well, she was right. Recently, a friend of mine got married to a man through an arranged marriage. When I got to my neighborhood it was dark, which was fine since there’s really not much to see anyway, nothing like a river or a tree or anything.